en·tan·gle·ment

” a complicated or compromising relationship or situation”

So I want to start off by saying that this, ain’t “THAT”. This is not a post about Will, Jada and August for numerous reasons. The most important one being that this isn’t a gossip blog. This post is really an opportunity to share my thoughts on modern day marriage as a single person. Outside the club, can’t even get in.

Growing up in a single-parent household, I wasn’t exposed to marriage in the traditional sense. I still saw romantic relationships in television and movies, but my perception of marriage was definitely idealistic to say the least growing up. As I’ve grown my views have changed, but I still believe marriage is supposed to represent a super exclusive union between people. But lately, marriages don’t seem so exclusive…they’re looking real “all welcome“ -ish and it’s disappointing.

I’m a single person who wants to be married one day. Exclusivity included, because if it isn’t I might as well stay single (my opinion *shrugs*). I like to think that marriage represents a new stage of relationship just like dating and engagement. Each are supposed to be an elevation to the status of your union, with marriage being the final form. At that stage, no one should be in you marital business.

I don’t know if social media is responsible but it really just feels like people’s marriages aren’t private anymore. They aren’t being held sacred and they aren’t between just the people who made vows.

I’ve seen married people in the club, no ring, women/men on their arm. You would never know they have a family at home unless you happened to know them personally or see them with them. I know women who have been propositioned by married men and men who have been propositioned by married women. Where is the exclusivity? Where is the respect? More importantly, what is the point?

I know that marriage is deeper than physicality. It’s a legal partnership that entails many things. There are benefits and drawbacks to that, but involving single folks in married people games is lunacy. Why risk your union like that? Why play around with something so serious? Even in marriages where there is no sexual exclusivity, not practicing discretion is wild. Your marriage is part of your public face.

If we’re all just going to continue to do whatever, go on journeys that find us engaging in entanglements and live our lives completely for ourselves….where does marriage fit in anymore? Why are people getting married? Marriage isn’t looking so cute from the outside. It’s starting to look like a lot of people in a lot of of mess.

I know what I want one day and a marriage with no exclusivity or bounds is NOT it. That’s my choice. So, I guess I have to respect the choices of the married folks too. Even if I don’t understand them.